I was reading through the 2006 March 13 New Yorker, when I came across this hilarious description of the artist Barnaby Furnas. The article describes how Barnaby developed his style. I've done some searching on his paintings, and they're actually quite good (also see).

It doesn't take anything away from this description of an "artist" discovering his true calling from the New Yorker article:

Furnas surveyed the canvas and tried to explain how blood had become his motif. "Basically, I wanted to do history paintings, and battle paintings," he said. "But I was having trouble painting figures. I was particularly frustrated with the faces and the hands, and as a way of getting around that I'd paint someone being shot, and then I didn't have to worry. Like I'm having trouble with the hands--splat!"

When I first read this (before I looked up his paintings), I figured, sure, here's proof that abstract painting is just a way for middling talented "artists" to sell their works.

Here's the search for Barnaby Furnas to find more of his works.