Energy deficient

Sunday, February 10, 2013

It’s after dinner: tonight was leftover Chicken Fricassee. I can now spell “fricassee” after mentioning it a few times. It’s not an easy word to spell and spellcheck is little help. There were only four chicken legs left from the two packets I originally cooked. I didn’t realize we ate so much chicken the other day.

Dinosaur is sitting in his bouncy next to me, and Tiger is playing in the kitchen with Doolies.

Today was a fun-filled day. We started with our normal morning routine. Breakfast was simple: Tiger wanted blueberry yogurt, and while we had yogurt and blueberries, we did not have blueberry yogurt. So we improvised and added blueberries to her honey yogurt (the one she calls Daddy’s yogurt). I also had a yogurt while Doolies slept in for a bit. We video chatted with my mother (hi, moms!) and then my younger sister’s children. Doolies joined us for that.

After we said our goodbyes, we started gathering our things to leave the house. Yes, on a Sunday. And we weren’t going to the mall. Instead we drove into Seattle, across the floating bridge, to the Seattle Asian Art Museum.

We figured it was a good day to visit, it being Chinese New Year. The museum was nice as our photographic evidence shows. After a foggy morning, it turned into a beautiful day. Not quite warm but lots of sun. After the museum we walked through Volunteer Park before making our way to a Thai place in Capital Hill.

Tiger is now tucked into bed and Dinosaur is back in his bouncy after spending time with the activity gym. He’s improving his hitting and grasping skills. He still seems more coordinated than Tiger at his age.

Slow going for a Sunday evening. I wondered this morning why it is that logic is not ingrained in people. I have a 2-year old so that’s where the question came from. It doesn’t seem to be the normal way of the world to understand logic. It’s something learned: cause and effect. Issue, fact pattern, rule, conclusion. What if it wasn’t like that? What type of world would that be? Do we bring bias to the world by applying logic? Logic does seem to work. Hypotheses are proposed and proven, and the hypotheses are then reused and shown to be consistent. That must mean something. Or maybe I’m just babbling.

As I said my brain is fuzzy tonight. I’m trying to make sense but nothing is happening. Wheels are spinning and smoke is stacking but the flywheel isn’t generating any thoughts. This is not unusual for me.

I need more focus on these entries. The diary stuff is fine but it usually doesn’t take the 30 minutes. That leaves me with time to think on things. Like now. I’m counting minutes but I shouldn’t be. Or maybe I should.

The dogs are restless in the room. They’re usually sleeping by this time.

It’s back to work tomorrow. That means early to rise. I will drop Tiger off in the morning before heading to work. Dinosaur slept well last night. I’ll probably stop reporting on it as it’s becoming the norm. You should expect reports when he doesn’t sleep. Hopefully I won’t be reporting much as we much prefer the long nights even though I’m not sure I feel more rested. Doolies believes she has 9 months of sleep debt to work off. I probably have something similar. Or maybe it’s just that I’m always tired regardless of how much I sleep.

I also wondered this morning what would happen if I didn’t feel tired all the time. I wondered if my life would be better or more interesting. I definitely have a limited amount of energy that I can spend. There are certain activities that add to it instead of taking away, but in the end, when I try to do too much I run into the depleted energy and wonder what it would feel like if it was always topped off; if I was always revving to go do something. Coffee helps a bit. It masks fatigue and grants focus but it doesn’t provide energy.

I’ve been wanting to track my energy levels throughout the day to understand them better. They ebb and flow based on meals, the quality of what I’m doing, and social interactions. There’s a pattern there and the data-centric part of me wants to understand.

I did manage a quick nap before dinner tonight. From the way I feel now it didn’t do much to satiate my tiredness. If anything it made it worse. Luckily we’re heading to bed soon. Dinosaur is napping in the bouncy. It’s almost time for his shower, bottle, and then sleep. I’ll be right behind him.